Thursday, January 16, 2014

The Great Alien Dog Disaster

This is Honeybee, the Frenchie
Yesterday brought one of the scarier moments of my experience as a mother. It involved my mother-in-law's French bulldog, Honeybee. Most people would think such a small dog, with such a small mouth would be incapable of doing any damage to a baby. In fact most of the time, people would think such a dog would be so sweet, hurting a baby would be the last thing such an animal would do.
   Of course, the thing about dogs is they get jealous. Honeybee has been jealous the every time kiddo has visited. In fact, she's been weird. She's followed people carrying kiddo. She's whined, squeaked, squawked, growled, yapped, and barked at him. She's sniffed at his crotch (I'm sure a very interesting smelling area for a dog!) and his head. She's licked at him. She's snorted at him. She's tried to get onto his changing pad while we were changing his diaper. She's stood on her hind legs for minutes in order to get attention. The whole thing has been weird.        
kiddo, throwing some duck lips
Once she even nipped his sock off. Of course, my father-in-law loves his dog and wants her to get along with the baby. He rushes to the dog's defense whenever someone freaks out about Honeybee getting too close to kiddo. And normally I would be alright with Honeybee doing her weird freakout, except what happened yesterday was not okay.

Kiddo, as you may imagine, has gotten bigger. My mother-in-law is not a very tall woman. She was holding kiddo and his legs dangled down, as one might expect. The dog was jumping and running under foot. My mother-in-law was asking my father-in-law to get the dog out of the way. Honeybee decided she couldn't handle my mother-in-law holding kiddo. She jumped up and nipped his foot. For a second kiddo was quiet. I looked at my mother-in-law and then said, "She just bit him!"

Sure enough, a second later kiddo began wailing. My mother-in-law went ballistic on the dog, even as she handed me the baby. It broke my heart to see kiddo so upset. I couldn't easily check his foot and soothe him, so instead, I just focused on soothing him while the dog was removed from the house. Then my mother-in-law came and helped me check his foot. As you might expect, even a small Frenchie has teeth and teeth scrape. His pinky toe was bleeding, but it was still moving and quite attached to his foot (thank GOD!). We cleaned him up and put a tiny bandage on it while he screamed and whimpered intermittently.

Honeybee is no longer allowed to be in the house when we visit, at least not until kiddo is able to defend himself (or she gets a muzzle!). We were lucky this time, but we don't want to push it.

kiddo and Java napping together
I wanted kiddo to get along with the animals in his life. But dogs and babies don't really mix, not unless their trained specifically to be. Cats, thankfully are another matter altogether. Kiddo actually pets Java - starting a week ago he loves to pet Java our cat, and Java purrs happily enjoying his attentions. They even curl up together. It's a completely different relationship than the one he has with Honeybee, and I couldn't be happier about that. It would be so awful to have to get rid of an animal because they couldn't handle being around a child.

What are your stories of babies/children and pets? Have you had success or has it been a disaster? Share below!

2 comments:

  1. I don't think you can generalize from this experience to all animals of a specific breed or species. Our dog, Molly, is incredibly patient with children of all sizes. They can pet her, pull on her ears, pull on her feet, and she'll just sit there and take it. She hasn't had any training in this department--she's just very patient with children (less so with other dogs). On the other hand, I've met quite a few cats who have scratched or bitten babies who've approached them. I don't think it's about the species, but about the specific animal and their environment. Honeybee is not all dogs; Java is not all cats. The best thing to do is simply trust your instincts in specific situations, and be a careful observer of animal behavior.

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    1. Firstly, while every animal is an individual, we can generally make statements about the nature of a given animal and do on a regular basis about all kinds of things. *Most* cats will run away when confronted by a loud flailing child. It's in their nature. As they become normalized to the behavior, their personality begins to come into play. It is true we did prep Java for Kiddo. It is also true that Java is an unusually social and incredibly sweet cat.

      Secondly, I have encountered some dogs that were very good with children. My aunt's dog, for example, was so gentle with Kiddo that she initiated a gentle game of chase as well as regularly licking him. The two of them became quite attached.

      Thirdly, I think small dogs bred to be companions or "fur babies" are more likely to get jealous and become problems (from both breeding and owner behavior). My cousin also has a French bulldog and that dog attempted to take off my baby cousin's face. Honeybee has since this event made a number of attempts at Kiddo (thankfully my in-laws are now working with her to address this behavior).

      Generalizations are useful, otherwise we wouldn't make them. However, there are exceptions and of course whatever generalizations we make, we should still supervise any child-animal interactions. To not would be bad parenting.

      I will continue to teach Kiddo to be gentle with animals and be on my guard whenever Kiddo is interacting with any animal.

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